How to build confidence

How to build confidence


Everyone wants confidence! However, there are very few people who are open to explaining how to build confidence. People are often engraved in their sense of self and their confidence which they deem lead to their success.


You should know that confidence is built on different things. But, it is mostly built on one’s choices and accomplishments that feed their passion. These should make one feel happy and proud of who they are.

Confidence can be easily spotted in others. But, it can be difficult to build up. In this article, I have put together key points to help you build your confidence. But first, I will give an overview of what confidence is.


What is confidence?

What is confidence?

Confidence can refer to a broad sense of belief and trust in one’s own ability to control one’s life, or it can refer to a situation-specific sense of belief and confidence in one’s own ability to control one’s life. For example, you might have a lot of self-confidence in one area but not so much in another.

Related: Things to do to boost your self-confidence

Having a strong sense of self-assurance can help you achieve more success in both your personal and professional lives. More confident people, for example, tend to score higher academically, according to research.

Studies have linked higher levels of self-confidence in athletes with an increased drive to practice their sport of choice, implying that confidence might play a part in your motivation to achieve your goals. Your self-esteem has an impact on how you present yourself to others.

Related: Goals: Everything you need to know

How to build confidence?

Confidence is a mental condition. Positive thinking, practice, training, education, and chatting with others are all effective techniques to develop or boost your confidence. Feelings of well-being, acceptance of your body and mind (self-esteem), and belief in your ability, abilities, and experience all contribute to confidence. Confidence is a quality that most people possess. The following key points can help you build confidence:

Get things done and look back at what you have already achieved

Get things done and look back at what you have already achieved

Accomplishment is the foundation of confidence. You will feel a lot better about yourself if you achieve modest and large goals. It all starts with your daily objectives: what do you need to accomplish today, as well as every day this week or three days this week, to help you reach your goal? If you reach your daily goals, you will be on track to meet your weekly and monthly goals, which will put you on track to fulfill your bi-annual and annual goals.

Keep in mind that improvement is slow and that major changes do not occur suddenly. You will feel confident in taking on a large job and setting a lofty goal since you know you’ll be able to achieve it. Make a goal for yourself and follow through.

Related: Goals: Everything you need to know

If you believe you haven’t accomplished anything, it’s easy to lose confidence. Make a list of everything you’ve accomplished in your life, whether it’s a good grade on a test or learning to surf. Keep the list handy and add to it anytime you accomplish anything noteworthy. When you’re feeling down, pull out the list and remind yourself of all the great things you’ve accomplished.

Monitor your progress

Monitor your progress

Breaking down your goals, big or small, into smaller goals and keeping track of your progress is the greatest method to achieve them. Whether you’re hoping to get promoted, obtain a better job, get into graduate school, change careers, eat healthier, or lose 10 pounds, keeping track of your progress is the greatest way to determine if you’re making progress.

Write down whatever your goal is, and try to quantify your achievements: the number of applications you’re submitting to jobs or graduate schools, what you’re eating, and how much you’re exercising. It will assist you in staying on track, and you will gain confidence as you observe your progress in real-time.

Related: Start finishing! The ultimate guide to implementing your idea into a completed project

Do the right thing

Do the right thing

Most self-assured people live by a set of values and make decisions based on those values, even when it’s difficult and not always in their best interests, but for the larger good. Your character is defined by your actions and decisions.

Ask yourself what you would do if you were the best version of yourself, and then do it. Even though it’s difficult and the last thing you want to do, and it requires a short-term sacrifice on your part, you’ll like yourself more and be prouder of who you are in the long run.

Exercise or get a hobby

Exercise or get a hobby

Exercising enhances memory retention, improves focus, helps manage stress, and reduces depression, among other things. It’s harder to be anxious when you don’t have any extra energy, because exercise helps every part of your life, except for being difficult and uncomfortable at times. So keep active and schedule time for self-care.

Make an effort to identify something about which you are truly passionate. It might be anything from photography to sports to knitting! When you’ve figured out what you’re passionate about, commit to trying it out. If you’re interested in or passionate about a certain activity, you’re more likely to be driven and develop abilities faster.

Be fearless and face your fears

Failure isn’t your adversary; it’s the fear of failure that holds you back. You’ll feel overwhelmed if you set large objectives and have big desires, and you’ll inevitably feel like you can’t do it. In those moments, you must look deep within yourself, muster every ounce of courage you possess, and simply keep going.

Every tremendously successful person has been terrified, but they’ve persisted in working and taking risks nonetheless because the goal they’re pursuing is more vital and urgent than their fear of failing. Consider how badly you want to attain your objective, then set your fears aside and take one day at a time.

Be fearless and face your fears

Stop putting off things like asking someone out on a date or applying for a promotion until you’re more confident. Facing your concerns head-on is one of the most effective methods to boost your confidence in these situations.

Face some of your worries that originate from a lack of self-confidence in practice. Even if you’re scared you’ll disgrace yourself or make a mistake, give it a shot. Even a little self-doubt can help you perform better. Tell yourself that this is only a test and see what happens.

You might discover that being nervous or making a few errors isn’t as horrible as you feared. And with each step forward, you acquire more faith in yourself. Finally, this can help you avoid taking risks that will have serious negative implications.

Stand-up for yourself

When someone tells you that your goal is dumb or that you can’t achieve it when you’re just starting, it’s easy to believe them because they’re adding to the chorus of doubts in your head. You reason logically, “How can I be correct when this individual, as well as my misgivings, tell me I can’t do it? That this concept is absurd.”

You must also inform those folks, particularly the voices in your head, that they are incorrect. You have it in you, so tell them you believe in your objective and yourself, and that you will achieve it.

When Joseph Gordon-Levitt is about to give up his pursuit of Larisa Oleynik in 10 Things I Hate About You, Heath Ledger offers him a pep talk, finishing it with, “Don’t let anyone, ever make you feel like you don’t deserve what you want.”

Follow through and focus on what you can control

Follow through and focus on what you can control

Folks admire people who claim they will do something and then follow through. More significantly, if you say you’re going to do something and then do it, you’ll respect yourself more, and believing in yourself will be simpler because you’ll know you’re not afraid of the effort. Your words will have more significance if you take action, and it will help you achieve your goals, develop your relationships, and feel proud of who you are.

Grounding yourself in things you can control, even if it’s just one area of your objective, will help you go forward with more confidence. Also, remember that confidence breeds confidence. You can ensure that you establish confidence from a position of inner strength by starting with the areas over which you have control.

Think long-term

Decisions made for short-term comfort that obstruct long-term goals are at the root of unhappiness: if you’re trying to save money, you can’t go out to eat as much; if you’re studying for your exams, you can’t go out with friends as often; if you’re trying to lose weight, you can’t eat french fries as often, and so on.

Big ambitions necessitate big sacrifices; you must dig deep and be extremely disciplined. It’s tedious and unpleasant right now, and it makes life a lot more difficult, but it’ll pay off in the end, and the pride you’ll experience will be well worth it.

You must determine whether short-term comfort or long-term ambitions are more important to you, but long-term goals will bring you considerably more enjoyment in the long run than short-term comfort.

Related: Goals: Everything you need to know

Do not worry or care about what others think

Do not worry or care about what others think

Many individuals will tell you that you will never be able to achieve your goal. People will attempt to tell you your goal is too great, or that you’re not ready, or that you can’t do it, or that it’s never been done before, etc., whether it’s rejection from employers, schools, or just bad input from friends or family, and you must not listen to them.

Related: Goals: Everything you need to know

You must be steadfast. While they may tell you that the chances are stacked against you, keep in mind that most people are wrong about the majority of things. Every day, people alter the world even though everyone around them tells them they can’t. You can do it if you believe you can. Don’t pay attention to them; belief in yourself.

Do more of what makes you happy

Do more of what makes you happy

What do you enjoy doing in your free time? Is it to go outside and walk, kayak, or simply enjoy the scenery? Or do you want to spend your days lounging on your couch, watching all of the great television that is available? Whatever it is that you enjoy, make time for it since life is short and you need time to nourish and recharge to be your best self.

Body language

When it comes to learning how to be confident, physiology is crucial. Mastering confident body language can set you on the road to success. Consider someone you know who you regard as incredibly self-assured. You undoubtedly sensed their confidence before they even started speaking when you first met them. Because of the way they held themselves and moved, you could tell they were confident.

They looked you in the eyes, shook your hand firmly, and stood tall. Now do a brief inventory of your physical condition. What is the state of your posture? What is your breathing pattern? Slouching, shallow breathing, and hanging your head are all signs of being in a bad mood. By influencing the way your body moves and reacts, you can affect how you feel.


Positive thinking can present itself in a variety of ways. Change your concentration first, because, “where focus goes, energy flows.” Rather than focusing on all of the ways things could go wrong, consider all of the ways they could go right. Consider how you’ll deliver your presentation and how thrilled your colleagues will be to hear it.

Related: Presence: The perks of public speaking

What you focus on, including what you focus on within your head, becomes your reality. Change your negative words to positive ones and begin to see the sunny side of things. You can change your state by altering your emphasis, both inside and outward. You can transform your life by changing your state.

Emotional control

Emotional control

Humans have a one-of-a-kind and extraordinary ability to feel a wide spectrum of emotions. However, if you let your emotions dominate your life without figuring out why you’re feeling that way, you’ll be controlled by them. The truth is that you have a complete influence on how you feel, especially your level of confidence.

Confidence is something you must cultivate rather than something you are born with. Building confidence assures you that you can complete any task you set out to undertake. Confidence, like any other emotion, is a feeling. It’s a sensation that you can train yourself to recognize in an instant.

Related: How to stay emotionally healthy and spiritually alive in the modern world

Have a growth mind-set

Have a growth mind-set

What do you believe it takes to be self-assured? You might believe that confidence comes only after a lot of success – which you can only learn to be confident in yourself once you’ve made a lot of money. This type of basic conviction significantly restricts your options.

Confidence doesn’t come from your accomplishments on the outside; it comes from within. If you’re confident, you’ll be able to pick yourself up and try again rather than throwing in the towel if you fail.

Your beliefs will progressively solidify after you begin taking practical activities toward your goal of becoming confident. It’s time to embrace a growth mentality and believe that you can learn how to boost your self-esteem. Whatever you hold in your thoughts constantly is exactly what you will experience in your life.

Figure out where your lack of confidence comes from

Finding the source of low self-confidence can lead to a road map for increasing positive self-confidence. Self-reflection and journaling are important places to start.

Try this exercise to figure out what’s causing your lack of self-confidence:

  • Make a list of any low self-confidence thoughts or phrases that come up for you over a week.
  • “Who or what told you that?” question yourself for each thinking or statement.
  • In this stage of your life, decide if you want to give that voice authority over your ideas.
  • Create a plan of action to go forward by writing down your reactions in a journal.

If you’re having trouble with this, working with a therapist or coach to recognize and alter problematic low-self-confidence ideas can be beneficial.

Stop comparing yourself to others

Do you think about how you look in comparison to the individuals you follow on Instagram? Perhaps you compare your pay to that of a friend. Making parallels is natural, according to social comparison theory. However, it is unlikely to increase your self-esteem. It may have the opposite impact.

Envy and how you feel about yourself are linked, according to a 2018 study published in Personality and Individual Differences. Researchers discovered that when people compared themselves to others, they felt envious. They felt worse about themselves the more jealousy they had.

When you realize you’re making comparisons, how do you gain confidence? First, remind yourself that this isn’t a good idea. Life isn’t a competition, and everyone is running their race.

It’s also beneficial to remind yourself of your talents and triumphs if you’re feeling envious of someone else’s life. Keep a gratitude notebook to help you remember the blessings in your life. This can assist you in concentrating on your own life rather than the lives of others.

Surround yourself with positive people

Surround yourself with positive people

Consider how you feel when you’re with your buddies. Do they help you rise or pull you down? Do they continuously pass judgment on you or accept you for who you are?

People you spend time with have a greater impact on your ideas and attitudes about yourself than you may realize. As a result, pay attention to how others affect you. It may be time to say goodbye if you feel horrible about yourself after spending time with a certain person.

Rather, surround yourself with individuals who genuinely care about you and want the best for you. Seek out those who are upbeat and can assist you in gaining confidence. A positive attitude and self-assurance go hand in hand.

Practice positive self-talk

Negative self-talk can limit your talents and undermine your confidence by convincing your subconscious that you “can’t handle” or “shouldn’t even try” something. Optimistic self-talk, on the other hand, can aid in the development of self-compassion, the reduction of self-doubt, and the acceptance of new difficulties.

Remind yourself that your ideas aren’t always accurate the next time you feel like you have no business speaking up in a meeting or that you are too out of shape to work out. Then figure out how to transform those negative thoughts into more positive self-talk.

Here are some examples of how to combat pessimistic self-talk and rephrase your thoughts more positively:

  • “I can’t manage this” or “This is impossible” is transformed into “I can do this” or “All I have to do is try.”
  • “I can’t seem to do anything correctly” becomes “I’ll try harder next time” or “At the very least, I learned something.”
  • “I despise public speaking” becomes “I despise public speaking,” while “Everyone has strengths and weaknesses” becomes “Everyone has strengths and weaknesses.”

Build confidence habits

Finally, you need to make sure you build confidence habits every day. Develop positive behaviors — and break harmful ones – to build and increase your self-esteem. Physical and mental health can be substantially improved with regular exercise and a nutritious diet. Furthermore, getting a good night’s sleep has been connected to greater optimism and self-esteem research.

It’s also a good idea to work on your branding. If you portray a favorable image of your true self, you’ll start to get the positive feedback that’s so vital for your self-esteem.

Related: Here are the 7 habits of highly effective people

Wrapping it up…

For you to build and have confidence you need to have that feeling of trusting in your abilities, qualities, and judgments. Research by Very Well Mind, suggests that confidence is very important to health and psychological well-being. Use the key tips in this article to reap the benefits of increasing your trust and belief in yourself.


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